1899: DNF

"DNF" means "Did Not Finish". A term which I will be using liberally from now on.

I start watching many more shows than I finish. I'll typically give a show a 10-minute test (or longer): if it's boring, trite, overly woke, or just bad by the 10-minute mark then I'll cut my losses and stop watching. In the past I haven't reviewed shows that miss the mark because I know my first impressions may not accurately reflect the show in its entirety. That still holds true, but it's also true that my results of the 10-minute test are valid for other like-minded people. So let's go!

Netflix's 1899 has an eerie vibe to it from the beginning. Every scene is moody, meaningful, and intense. Like a soap opera it always seems like something is about to happen - and like a soap opera, nothing ever actually happens! That's probably hyperbole, but I watched 90 minutes of it and nothing had happened by the time I called it quits.

I originally stopped after my 10-minute test because of an overly woke scene in the beginning. The main gal, a lady doctor, joins another gal for lunch on a cruise ship, in 1899, and the two women lament at how The Patriarchy is oppressing the lady doctor and not giving her the same opportunities as a male doctor (paraphrased). It's heavy-handed anachro-centricism, projecting the sensibilities and talking points of a modern feminist into a story set 120 years earlier.

While looking for a cover image to write up this very article I ran across another review of 1899. This review gave it 4/5, said it was made by the creators of Dark, and said it only gets going after the third episode.

Dark, also on Netflix, is an amazing show, one of the best time-travel shows ever made. I decided I owed 1899 a second chance and kept watching.

Well. Like I said, nothing ever happened. I felt like I'd been watching it forever, trying to get through three episodes at least. I decided to check and see if I was almost done with the second episode... and turns out I was only halfway through. That's when I quit. Ain't nobody got time for that.